Learning about sexuality 143
Finding a loving partner
Like other women, you deserve a partner who respects you and cares for you. You
deserve a partner who will listen to you and who treats you well. You deserve to
find someone who loves you for who you are—a partner who values your strengths
and who will help you with your limitations. You deserve a partner who wants your
help, your trust, and your love.
Many women who find loving partners say they refused to believe wrong ideas
about disability. They gained skills and found ways to contribute to their families.
And they learned to respect themselves. When you respect and value yourself, you
are more likely to find a partner who respects you too. For information on self-
esteem, see pages 62 to 65.
After my accident, I developed a hunched back and had
a hard time moving around. But I found a loving man
who was drawn to my personality and my courage. He
likes the way I laugh away my troubles. When he asked
me to marry him, I agreed. Now we have a beautiful
Before my partner asked me to marry him, we talked
openly about my disability. He told me that he accepted
me as I was, including my limitations. He promised
never to be ashamed of me. We have a marriage based
on trust and respect—and we also have two children.
My husband and I fell in love when we were working together. Our
parents met and arranged the marriage for us. His mother was very
good to us, but some of his relatives did not want to accept me. My
husband is a government official and they thought he would not be able
to travel with a disabled wife. At first, I was hurt by their opinions. But
with my husband’s support, we have been able to travel together and
build a strong partnership.
When a girl with a disability learns job skills and gets an education,
she is more likely to find a loving partner. A job usually gives her more
opportunities and stronger self-esteem. And it is easier for other people to
believe that a woman with a disability who has a job is someone who could
contribute to the family.
A Health Handbook for Women with Disabilities 2007