How to Be Okay with Being LGBT

For some, figuring out that they are lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender is a long journey, and for others it's the clearest answer in the world. The next step after this realization involves not only accepting but being proud of who you are. This article with aid you in accepting your LGBTQ+ identity.


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    Come out to your closest friends. If you're out to supporting friends, they'll love you through it, and they'll aid you in the journey ahead. They'll be a constant reminder of what you want to achieve with yourself—accepting yourself, and all of yourself.
    • If you have no in-person close friends, try coming out on an online support network. Be sure to use a screen name for safety purposes.
    • Do not come out if it puts your health or safety at risk. If your parents are potentially abusive, or they might kick you out of the house, do not tell them.
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    Build your support network. For different people, this network will vary; it might be your family, your close friends, or new friends you make in the LGBTQ+ community. Regardless of where you find support, hold onto it and nurture it. As you come out to people or meet new people who seem to accept who you are, fully, work to make them your friends.
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    Surround yourself with media that shows varied sexuality/gender identity in a positive light. While the media once included few gay role models, there are now many more shows and movies that highlight LGBTQ+ individuals and culture in a positive or neutral way; focus on those, and ignore media that still relies on stereotypes or even ridicule for a laugh.
    • If a show you like starts making bigoted jokes and upsetting you, quit following it. It is not worth the emotional pain. Find an LGBTQIA-friendly show instead.
    • Ask LGBT+ people on the internet for recommendations.
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    Keep a journal. Journals can be great outlets for all kinds of emotion, from negative to positive. If you're having a bad day and need to vent, write it down. If you're feeling proud and happy about how accepting your friends are or how amazing your newest crush is, write it down. It helps to get your feelings out, and you can refer back to your positive points when you need to be cheered up.
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    Realize you are normal and can live a very happy life. Members of the LGBTQ+ community find partners, have families, thrive in their careers, and can enjoy all of life's ups (and downs), just like anyone else. Watch coming out stories on YouTube, as well as read coming out advice on the internet. Realize this is your human condition, this is how you were made, and it's awesome. By looking into coming out, you'll see that most - not all - LGBT members have acceptance when they come out. Remember, if you embark on that process, make sure it's safe and a good time to do so.
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    Get rid of the bigots in your life. The problem is with them, not with you. Be selective about who you let into your life. If they're a drain on your energy or make you feel worse about your identity, don't invite them in, metaphorically or literally.
    • Alternatively, you can try to have a discussion with them about it and see if they'll consider opening their mind. But don't do this at the expense of your own happiness. If they're adamant about their beliefs, don't wear yourself out by arguing. Drop them.
    • If you can't get rid of them (e.g. they are your parents), keep your distance. Do what you need to do to protect your mental health—you are not obligated to spend time with people who damage your self-esteem. Leave as soon as you are able.
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    Embrace your identity. Recognize that it is okay to be who you are, and there is nothing defective or immoral about you. You are okay—every single part of you, including your gender identity and sexual orientation.
    • Start taking steps towards being more open. You may begin feeling much better.
    • Even if you are stuck in the closet, you can still love yourself. Embrace positive media, network with other LGBTQIA people, and practice radical self-love.


  • Dress as you like, and ignore those who think clothes are somehow linked to sexuality.
  • Confide in your friends when you're conflicted about your identity. They'll serve as a means to cheer you up, as well as a source of constant support.
  • Know you're not alone. Many others identify the same as you and are living happy lives. You can too.
  • Come out to your parents if it's safe. They can lead you to accepting yourself.
  • Take advantage of the countless self-help sources on the internet.
  • If you ever need to, phone the Trevor Project. "Our trained counselors are here to support you 24/7. If you are a young person who is in crisis, feeling suicidal, or in need of a safe and judgment-free place to talk, call The Trevor Lifeline now at 866-488-7386." "A national 24-hour, toll free confidential suicide hotline for gay and questioning youth."


  • Never come out in a situation that could put your safety at risk.
  • Coming out in public can cause bullies to take notice and attack you. This is not your fault, but unfortunately the burden lies upon you to stay safe.

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Categories: LGBT Identity | Assertiveness & Self Esteem