How to Handle Being Stuck in the Middle of a Fight

Everyone hates when two of their good friends are fighting and they're nagging you to take their side. But if you follow these steps, you have a chance of keeping a healthy friendship with both friends.

Steps

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    Stay neutral. After one friend brings up the topic of hating the other friend, just mildly brush aside the comment. For example, just calmly say, "I don't really want to get into this fight. I still want to be friends with both of you." You could also just keep on talking as if you didn't hear him/her.
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    Find time to do things separately with both friends. For example, go to the mall with one of your friends and a picnic with the other one. That way, it'll help your friends realize you aren't choosing sides.
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    Be a Good Listener. Listen to both of them. Maybe you can understand what each of them are feeling when they can't understand each other.
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    Encourage them to Practice Nonviolent Communication. If you can get them to sit down together, and you can mediate their discussion along the guidelines of NVC, they might be able to work out their fight.

Tips

  • Never say "I can't hang out with you because I already told (insert name here) I would hang out with him/her." Instead, just say, "I already have plans."
  • Be sure to spend equal time with both friends. i.e. Sit with one of them at lunch in school one day, then hang out with the other after school.
  • Don't join sides just because the other one will do something good for you.

Warnings

  • Don't let either of your friends pull you into gossip. It's easy because one of them can make the other seem like a horrible person.

Article Info

Categories: Self Defense