How to Improve Your Confidence

Three Methods:Renewing the MindChanging your peer groupLetting Go of the Past

Confidence is that elusive factor that everyone admires and everyone wants. At some point in your life you have questioned your own level of confidence and wished it was higher. Your level of confidence impacts the quality of the decisions that you make about your life. If you believe the theory that suggests that we attract into our lives who we are - then creating and sustaining high levels of confidence is vital to your well-being.

Method 1
Renewing the Mind

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    Watch your intake. What you read, watch, and listen to affects your mindset. If you are 'over-dosing' on soaps and reality TV, odds are you are also indulging in gossip, adding to the rumor mill. Challenge: reduce the amount of hours of TV you watch each day. Read a book or magazine about a topic you are interested in. Listen to a different radio station or genre of music you have not listened to before. Reason: to challenge the beliefs you hold and also raise your awareness of new and different things.
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    Spend some time being quiet. Spend an allocated period of time (10-15 minutes is ok as a start) being quiet and just meditating (or praying) about your life. Challenge: To remove yourself away from others. Reason: to focus on the power of silence and improve your levels of concentration.
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    Believe in yourself. One of the key steps involved in raising your level of confidence is to believe it for yourself. You need to believe, accept and be in no doubt that you are a confident person. Spend time imagining you at your absolute best. How would you talk, respond to problems, dress and who would you hang out with? Challenge: value the time that you spend doing this process. Reason: to embed the belief within your mind that you are confident

Method 2
Changing your peer group

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    Try a friends audit. When was the last time you did a 'valuable friends' audit? What do you mean? I hear you cry. I mean have you ever taken the time to re-evaluate your friendships? Are there people around you that are constantly negative, pour cold water over your positive ideas, are miserable and fickle? Are these the kind of people that can help you to grow in confidence? Challenge: be honest about the value of the friends you have and make some bold decisions. Reason: to remove yourself from negative influences and environments.
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    Take a look around for people you admire. Have someone in your group (or circle) that you admire for their skills or their achievements. Observe the way they handle conflict, face new challenges and communicate with people. Challenge: Attend a club/association/group associated with a hobby/topic you are interested in. Reason: to meet new people that are different to your current circle of friends

Method 3
Letting Go of the Past

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    Identify that key person (or key people) that you believe upset you or hurt you in the past. Write a short letter detailing how you feel and then conclude by stating that you forgive them and now you are letting this go. You can seal the envelope or throw it away - but in any event this is a releasing process and you are saying goodbye. Challenge: to be honest as you write - allowing all your feelings to be recorded. Reason: to pour out those negative feelings of betrayal, hurt, mistrust and bitterness.
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    Identify people that you may need to apologize to and go and do it. You can make a phone call, send an email, write a letter or speak to them in person. Don't let this shadow hang over you any longer. Release yourself from this burden. Challenge: be honest about your own shortcomings. Reason: to let go of past history and start afresh.
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    Clear out old letters, cards, texts. belongings that have negative or hurtful links for you. Clearing out your closet is therapeutic and a part of the letting go of your past process. Challenge: be brave enough to get rid of those things. Reason: to create space for new and positive things to come into your life.


  • Making small changes each day leads to massive transformation
  • Write an affirmation statement and read it at least 3 times a day
  • Do not compare yourself to other people
  • You have gifts, talents and skills that are waiting to be developed and used


  • Don't let other people put you off wanting to be the best 'YOU' - you can be!

Article Info

Categories: Youth