How to Tell Your Parents That You're in a Girl to Girl Relationship

If you're in a same-sex relationship and you want to tell your parents, navigating the conversation can be difficult, but being honest with your family has its own upsides.

Steps

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    Think, is there a reason you should not tell your parents? Telling them if you know they are homophobic is a whole other hurdle. You can use some roundabout conversational approaches to see if your fears are warranted.
    • Maybe do a practice like saying, "A girl in my friends art class got kicked out for being a lesbian; what do you think of that?" If the answer is in favor of kicking her out, then beware that their reception to your honesty may be similar.
    • Ask for their opinions on LGBT+ issues and celebrities.
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    Make a plan B, in case they kick you out of the house. You will need to ask a friend or someone who you can trust.
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    Talk to your girlfriend about what might happen. Do her parents know she is with you? You will need to talk about what to do if your parents are not okay with this. You don't want your honesty with your parents to affect her, too, if she's not ready for that step. Make sure you tackle the issue as a couple, as well as individually with your respective families.
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    See if your parents are even okay with you dating. If they think you are to young to even date a boy, then you should not tell them that you're dating a girl.
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    Consider tackling each parent separately. Telling the most understanding one first may help. This could be your father or your mother. You will probably feel safer this way. It also means you can have someone on your side.
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    Tell them that you really like this girl, and that's not anyone's fault. This is where you can explain that homosexuality is not a choice, and they need to understand that.
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    Give them time. They may cry, scream, kick you out, be supportive, or shrug. There are many reactions; hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.
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    Break it to them slowly. Have a long conversation about stuff like sexuality. This is so they can slowly take it in.
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    Accept yourself, no matter what happens.

Tips

  • Understand that this will have a huge impact on your life.

Warnings

  • If the relationship has gotten to sex already, you may want to leave that out. Unless you have health concerns or need their help and advice in this area, talking to them about sex, on top of revealing your relationship, may be a lot for them to take in all in one conversation. That being said, if they ask and you feel the situation is right, try to be honest - it may help your relationship with them.

Article Info

Categories: Coming Out as LGBT